The first thing Surf tells me this morning when he comes online.

His date for tonight cancelled.

GOOD! DICK. He's not made fuck all for plans with me.

I am so sick of this shit! Why the fuck am I getting so sucked in to some fucking nerdy, ass hat wearing little boy!?

FUCK HIM.

I said it made me feel like a pile of garbage because he's not made any time over the past MONTH to see me despite texting me and trying to chat with me online every single day. He got pissed off at ME for GUILTING HIM and logged off.

I'm sick of his amateur dramatics. I'm tired of trying to talk to him like an adult and getting fighting in return.

I wish I could be done with him. I should have stuck with dumping him! WTF I've not even SEEN him since then so there's no fucking difference.

I tired of this boy. I'm tired of feeling bad because he'd rather be with anyone else but me even though he strings me along like a little puppy. I guess it would make me feel pretty good about myself too if some awesome, super cool, hot guy liked me. But I'd never be so callous as to not even take into account their feelings. And he knows I have feelings for him.

He said he'd never intentionally hurt me, but I think repeatedly unintentionally hurting me is bad enough.

THIS IS POINTLESS.